Have you ever went out on a date with yourself?
Just decide to ditch the normal routine, and take some time to know you?
For many, this can be difficult. The thought of being somewhere alone without familiar faces can be intimidating. When you’re so used to doing things with people around, even if it’s just one person, it can be difficult transitioning into alone time.
A Lesson That I Have Revisited
As you can see, this is a note I wrote to myself in the year 2016. A time that I was undergoing a spiritual journey in trying to figure out life’s meaning. The beginning of an era in which I began recording daily entries in what would be the first of many journals (I think I have over 10 now, not too many but still have lost count lol)!
In that year, I read a number of self-help books, practiced yoga and meditation and tried becoming “one with the universe” (before becoming saved later towards the end of the year haha).
I made it a point to become comfortable with doing things alone in public, sort of taking it a step further from what I was already used to. Shopping alone is nothing compared to doing things most people wouldn’t dare to attempt (like eating at huge public and open spaced restaurants, having outdoor picnics and touring city sites solo.) Then, I really learned the value of just doing things on my own. And even for some time, being in a relationship and all, I started to forget the core essence of just living freely without heavy weights and expectations (which thankfully I am getting back in the rhythm of).
Learning to love yourself is important because you develop into the person you need to become in order to attract like-minded people on the same path of pursuing Godly purpose.
Who are you when no one else is around?
A question I think at some point we should all ask ourselves (if you can, just take a minute now to really ponder that thought).
For some of you, maybe God has been trying to redirect your focus unto Him. The reason you haven’t met anyone yet, or have entered in relationships that hit an abrupt end, is because it is time to learn yourself.
You see so many of us are bombarded with this idea that we need certain people and certain things within arms reach to make us happy. But not enough know that we must reach purpose before reaching the person (meaning you must chase after your calling so that when the time does come for friendships and relationships, these people will be working with you in moving closer towards God).
The right things you should be focusing on are your gifts and your passions. What makes you unique and how can you ensure that your jewels are kept preserved?
What Does It Mean to Really Date Yourself?
Well just as you’d go out eagerly to meet someone new, take yourself out somewhere and discover what makes you, you.
Instead of hitting up that friend, just take yourself out for a change. Visit a gym. Take a new class. Treat yourself to some new food. Schedule a nail or hair appointment. Go to the bookstore and read up on new prints. Check out a local poetry slam or art gallery (do whatever you want or have always wanted to do, you get the picture). Just explore and make new memories!
Of course having a social life is important and healthy (as God did create us with needs and socializing is one of them). However, there should be a day out of each/every other week where you go out and do things specifically for yourself. See how you are away from other people, and enjoy being comfortable in your presence.
We have our whole lives ahead to be entangled in commitment and responsibility therefore seize the opportunity now to be free and have fun!